Undated

(The following is portions of the journal in semi-readable format, the image of it is below.)

All of this, I need it on parchment. Not for anyone to read, no just so I do not forget. Forget… no I could never forget, my mind is so vividly aware, but then why is so much scattered? Focus! Parchment. Ink. It has to be all here.

Gerik the Highlander. Gerik the Highlander. Gerik the Highlander. Gerik the Highlander. Gerik the Highlander. Gerik the Highlander. Gerik the Highlander. Gerik the Highlander. Gerik the Highlander. Gerik the Highlander. Gerik the Highlander. Gerik the Highlander. Gerik the Highlander. Gerik the Highlander. Gerik the Highlander. Gerik the Highlander. Gerik the Highlander. Gerik the Highlander.
No not him, was it him? I remember sleeping, oh it felt so good to sleep again. Shurin. I slept beside him. I think. Mizune? Yes, he was there I cries. I was afraid. He touched my hair, like so long ago. His heartbeat filled my ears, I can still hear it now if I listen. I must listen. Ba-Bump, can you hear it?

Then! Then, oh then the ground. The soil, the grass, all that lay below. It swallowed me whole, I was but another drop of water, sinking so deeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep.
I struggled. I fought the ground, slashed it, stabbed it, screamed at it. Oh this dagger, never leave my side for I am so powerful, to kill, power…
Oh… but it was not… my dreams have found there way in to reality-
Or… or is it the other way? Am I still dreaming? Is it just my reality bleeding over in to my mind? So confusing, I see the dead around me, I watch them, they are everywhere. Gerik the Highlander. Did I kill him too? Possibly. Was he the ground? I thought I saw him there, perhaps he too was swallowed whole. I left him behind, I ran after the corpses.

Shurin is gone again. I looked all over for him. He must have gotten up from sleep and wandered away. Did he know I was there, protecting him? I freed myself from the ground, it will not swallow me, but perhaps he got tired of waiting as I did.
I keep forgetting to hate him.
I hate him.

I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him.
I love him.

Hyur. Dark Hyur. Dark Hyur cloaked in black. Dark Hyur cloaked in black with red eye.
Kind Hyur.
Fixed my arm, it hurt terribly. Spoke words to me, not kind. Not… angry. I am unused to words now, spoken not in fear or rage. All that lies in between is mere else. Otherwise. Books, he had so many. More tombs than I’ve read in my life, he let me have one.
Kindness… why is he so kind? Even this… speck of it… makes me forget it all. The red sky, the black grass. The decomposing bodies. The stench.
Why does he only have one eye? I have two…

I then find myself laying in a field of grass. It pricks my skin, a thousand needles, and the sky above, the red moon above, swirls the clouds in massive circles, as if to swallow us. I should just wait here, let it swallow me whole. Consume me. Purge me.
I’ve nothing left.
These vials he gave me. Dark, dark Hyur. Focus, he said.
Focus.
I will drink one.
Sleep… perhaps.
Dream…
Die…

Feel.

(Three more journals follow this one in the same ineligible format, growing worse and worse.)